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What to Do When Your Spouse Asks for a Divorce 

Perhaps you knew this day would arrive or were caught off guard. You probably feel overwhelmed and astonished because your spouse has requested a divorce. “What should I do next?” You and your spouse may agree that the relationship should end, or you may wish to fight for your marriage. Talk to a divorce attorney Boston to learn what you should and should not do if your spouse wishes to divorce you. 

Trying reconciliation if your spouse wishes to divorce 

You may feel devastated and broken if your spouse wants a divorce. If your spouse wants a divorce and your goal is to reconcile, here are some things you should and should not do. 

Things not to do if your spouse wants to divorce and you want reconciliation 

  • Ignore them 

Ignoring the elephant in the room is the last thing you should do. If your spouse has clarified that they want a divorce, you must confront the problem if you hope to reconcile. You will never have a healthy, happy marriage if you do not act quickly. 

  • Beg or nag them 

Nobody wins others over to their cause by pleading or pestering. This adds to the pressure, promotes an aggressive environment, and puts your spouse on the defensive. While you should not disregard your spouse if they want a divorce, you should also not suffocate them with begging, pleading, or nagging. 

  • Emotionally manipulate them 

If your spouse wants a divorce, they have most certainly given this choice careful consideration. Bringing out old wedding photos or bragging about how much fun you had on trips over the years will not address the problem. There are probably intricate issues in your marriage that have been fermenting for a long time. Never emotionally manipulate your spouse or fail to handle difficult marital issues directly. 

  • Act needy or desperate. 

You may have been taken aback by your spouse’s desire for a divorce, but now is not the moment to stalk them all day and act like a sad puppy dog. Acting desperate and needy is never appealing and will never win your spouse over to your side. Consider using this time to dig deep, listen to why they want a divorce, and ask yourself if you can give them what they want and need. 

  • Involve the children 

Never use your children as bargaining chips if your spouse requests a divorce. They should never be told anything they do not need to know, and you should never try to reclaim your spouse by using your children as a spokesman. If you wish to reconcile with your spouse, keep your children out of this process. 

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